Thursday, December 20, 2007

2007 the year that was

Driving back to work after having dinner at ITPL, Bon Jovi screaming "It's my life" through my car stereo. Yeah sure, I agree , it is my life. I can do whatever I want with it .

Or can I ? In the past year, have I really done whatever I wanted? Or should I be living my life whichever way I like? Do I even know what I want from life ? All these nonsensical questions whirl around in my mind.

The wannabe racing driver me is pushing the speedo up to 100 . Attention wanders from the road for a second . Sure enough the ever present cow in the middle of the road is staring back at me with an impassive face that says "I'm not moving out of the way buddy, your turn today" . Screeching brakes and deft steering narrowly saves the day.

Flash back to the start of the year . Remember those steely resolutions to get more excercise in this year for sure ? Unless you consider slouching in front of TV as excercise, I don't recall making much headway on that. "It's not your fault , you were too busy" whispers an angelic voice in my left year. I begin to relax and slowly get back into mood of this song.

My peace is shattered by a sarcastic rolling laughter to my right. I am startled to find a tiny red colored guy sitting on my shoulder. He says "Too lazy to get off your fat butt and so something , aren't you ?".

My blood instantly boils . How dare you accuse me of such things. Don't you know I work 10 hours a day ? The red devil laughs even more : "You stay in office for 10 hours alright, how many hours do you really work ? " Why you nasty little dwarf, are you trying to tell me that I am inefficient ? Don't you know how hard I need to think to solve all these complex problems ? "Think hard ? You can hardly think any more " retorts the little devil. This guy is really annoying me now and he is showing no inclination to go away. I try ignoring him for a while.

The dwarf chirps after couple of minutes. "And what about your resolution to read for one hour everyday before sleep". What about it , I ask him. Haven't I been doing that ? "Well you have been mostly reading newspapers, Calvin and Hobbes and Dilbert. You were supposed to be reading more serious stuff that that. Whatever happened to all those classics that you were supposed to read", he asks. I am white hot with anger now. Well sue me then, I say. According to me I am reading every day. I don't care what you think about it.

Not even a minute passes , the guy poses another question "Have you been treating all your friends well this year ?". Whaddya mean you pest, of course I have been . "Really ?Are you sure you have not picked fights with them over trivial issues ?" . Well , may be a couple of times I have, but I was under lots of stress that time , I retort. I am feeling a touch defensive now.. What should I do to make this guy go away ?

"Don't worry about me, I will go away. Just think about it ?", he says this and vanishes into thin air.

What a relief !! Finally he is gone. Who is he to ask me all these questions ? Sure, I am living my life the way I want it .

Only I am not so sure now what is that I wanted from life.

The next song starts on my stereo "Another day in Paradise" , says Phil Collins.

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